The other day in meditation, when I had filled myself with Light, I was told that it was time to let everything go. I didn’t understand what I was meant to let go of….. Hadn’t I let go of everything yet? Was there more? I said that I had surrendered to the Light a long time ago, and that I’d given permission for anything that had to be done, to be done. Apparently, that wasn’t what this was about however, as I was asked to look inside for any pain that I was still holding on to.
Although my brain told me there was nothing there, my inner Self went to explore and soon found some pockets of deeply hidden pain that I hadn’t been able to face. I acknowledged them and the tears started to flow. Spirit embraced me and the flood gates opened. The pockets of pain flooded with Light and a Love so infinite filled me that it washed all the pain away. I still felt it for a moment, but it soon transformed into Love so strong, that there was nothing else.
I was no longer. All that had been ME before was being re-forged in the fires of an all-encompassing Love. I saw what looked like a massive diamond, perfectly cut and polished, with sharp edges and surfaces that reflected an enormous amount of Light. Then I exploded into millions of particles of Light, which swirled around in endless space. I was everywhere, and fully conscious of Being. Rainbow coloured particles of Light slowly swirled around in a timeless void, yet all of them were me. Suddenly, all my particles came together, like a sharp intake of breath, and I became a vortex of pure brilliant Light.
After losing myself to the feeling of pure JOY this gave me for a while, I thanked Spirit for this wonderful cleansing and came out of my meditation.
Today, as I’m preparing to go on holiday tomorrow, it’s finally hit home that I’m actually going. I’m feeling stressed, super excited and yet apprehensive, which I suppose is normal when going on a big trip like this for the first time in 42 years, but that’s not the only thing. Taking this holiday represents a big breakthrough for me – not only am I leaving my comfort zone and my family behind, but it’s also a big step towards the Freedom I’ve been working towards for so long, which in itself is a bit frightening to be honest. What will I do with all this freedom? I’m so used to working and the demands of having a family to look after, that the thought of not having to do anything at all is somehow quite daunting.
I’ve waited 42 years for this cycle to complete itself – 6 times the 7-year cycle that is supposed to bring big changes into your life – so this will be a very significant rebirth for me, and I’m not at all surprised to be feeling as apprehensive as I do. I feel that my meditation symbolised exactly what is happening right now – I’m about to see myself exactly as I am, sharp edged and reflecting an enormous amount of Light. My Light particles swirling around in a timeless void may be how I’ll feel on holiday – as if my normal life is temporarily suspended. Of course there will be a sudden end to my holiday and I’m feeling excited about the new life that awaits me when I come back, represented by the vortex of pure brilliant Light!
I know that all the apprehension will fall away once I’m on the plane and I’ve no doubt at all that I’ll thoroughly enjoy my holiday once I’m there – I probably won’t want to come back! I’ll be sure to let you know!